tuesday.

I feel like I've been in a bit of a slump lately. Maybe it's because summer is ending and I know what's around the corner. The leaves are already changing and falling around here. It makes me sad knowing that soon the sun will only be a source of light and not warmth. Here are some things that have been on my mind.

- Emmett has been especially needy and clingy (separation anxiety phase?) with me lately. When anyone comes over he clings to me because he thinks I'm going to leave. He wants me to cuddle with him a lot and if we need to cross the street he only wants me to hold his hand. He needs a lot of time-outs too. They seem to be helping with hitting and throwing. He also won't eat. Anything.

- I have felt extremely bored lately. I try really hard to keep myself busy by doing little projects, reading or organizing, but it doesn't help. I want to start a new activity or hobby for myself but I feel like finding babysitting arrangements and the time to do it will annoy me to the point of not wanting to keep up with it. I think I'm just so ready for that next stage for our family. I'm counting down the minutes until Matt graduates and gets a better job. He will be much happier then too.

- Ethnie is going through a demanding/whining stage. It's been hard to deal with because it can be disrespectful. Ethnie is such a good girl and it irks me to see her acting this way. It takes every ounce of patience I have to stay calm about it and deal with it in a mature, caring way. I know it will pass, but what are the teenage years going to be like?!

- I've had this tremendous urge to go on a shopping spree. The temptation is so strong and it's killing me! At least buying the kids new clothes and school supplies has helped.

- Little messes around our house have been driving me crazy. Toys. Clothes. Dishes. Crumbs. I feel like I want to just throw whatever is in my way instead of put it where it belongs. I've tried to rebel by not sweeping the floor again because I just did it an hour ago, but I don't have it in me. It's too hard for me to look at. It's also hard because Matt's definition of a clean house and mine are very different.

- I'm so tired of the presidential election I could throw up. I just want everyone to get along and respect whoever is chosen to run our country. It's definitely not a job I would want to take on.

- My hair has been so snarly I want to rip it out of my head. Matt wants me to get a pixie cut. Maybe I should think about it more...

- I've been worried lately that I'm not a good enough wife or mother. I compare myself to other women a lot and I know it's not healthy. All I know is that I can honestly say I am trying my best and I will always try my best in this aspect of my life. I love my family!

The rest of my week is busy and filled with fun things. Here's to thinking positive thoughts!